PC: Sarah Sweeney
I think you guys know me well enough that you can appreciate when I share embarrassing things, right? I swear when I was younger, embarrassing things happened to me all of the time. Thankfully as I’ve gotten older, they seem to have become a little fewer and farther between. I’m guessing that is a result of me caring less and not me actually doing fewer ridiculous things, because I still do.
So on to the story (stories, really). Yesterday I got out of the shower and was drying off. Typically post shower, I apply some kind of tanning product at least a few days a week. I almost always put one on my face, but I’ll go days between applications on the rest of my body. Recently I’ve been using this aerosol tanning product for just my face and neck, and it’s been working well. It splatters a little sometimes, but for the small area of my face, it’s pretty good.
So I pull my hair back out of the way and then grab the can and start spraying my face. And something’s not right. It feels different and smells different, but when I looked at my face it didn’t look very different. So I sprayed some more, and a lot of it got concentrated under my nose (not a cute look), but otherwise I couldn’t tell the usual difference in skin color. And then it hits me! I was using my Batiste brown dry shampoo! The cans look so similar that I had grabbed the wrong one. My face and neck were now covered in this brown powdery substance, and I had specifically created a mustache as well. So shockingly ridiculous of me! Thankfully the stuff isn’t permanent, so I quickly hopped back in the shower and started over. Sheesh.
After I showered and actually got the right products on, I went to get dressed. I was planning on wearing a new dress to church, and it was much more fitted than my usual choices. I opted to try wearing a pair of Spanx that I’ve rarely worn, just to smooth things out and to feel a little more comfortable in something so snug. I put them on, they fit as intended (I believe), and we went to church.
Oh. My. Gosh. During the first meeting of church, I kept thinking about how uncomfortable I felt, just in general. Why is my headache getting worse? Why am I feeling short of breath? Why am I dying to get out of here? And then I realized it was the Spanx. I swear the longer I wore them, the more they contracted! It felt like I was wearing a corset. I was miserable! I lasted through the first hour, but after that meeting ended, I’d had enough. With two hours of church left, Sunday School to teach, and life to live, there was no way I was staying in those ridiculous constricting undergarments. So I headed straight for the bathroom and undressed right there in a stall. Into my bag went the Spanx, and out I came a free woman. Thankfully the dress wasn’t that clingy and I felt fine without the extra lining. But even if I hadn’t, I’d rather have worn my jacket the rest of the day than keep those on. I got so many compliments that day on my dress, but every time someone mentioned it, all I wanted to do was talk Spanx instead. I didn’t. But I wanted to.
Anyways, I think Spanx have their place, and from what I hear now, I just need to size up a few sizes to get the smoothing effect rather than the squeezing one. Props to you if you can wear them at all. I think they work, but my whole self could not suffer through them.
BUT, speaking of Spanx, you know what Spanx item I can get behind? These faux leather leggings. The funny thing is that I also just bought these Spanx leggings, and I have nothing but good things to say about them. They don’t squeeze you to death, but they do pull things in. The sheen is just right, and they are really comfortable. I bought them for our trip to Italy next week (I swear, everything I’m buying for that trip is black), but I wanted to try them out before we left. They really are as good as they say!
If you love Spanx, I hope you don’t have hard feelings. I just had to share a little crazy with you on this Monday. Have a great start to your week!